jiwa kacau

Dear,

i just came back from a journey, a quest of searching something tht infinitely questionable..
ive been through so many things, yet neglecting more of my obligation of creation... aper aku mengarut nih.. actualy aku rasa mcm tak tenang..makin hari makin serabut..tak sure tentang apa..tapi rasanya tentang dia.
apa?kenapa dia? dia siapa? ..kenapa aku perlu dia!!? bodohnya... kenapa perempuan seperti aku begitu lemah sehinggakan membiarkan dirinya dimanipulasikan..mengapa satu entiti dr kaum Adam ini begitu dominan walhal kunjungannya tidakku undang, laungannya tidak ku sahut, peluangnya tidakkan ku rebut..
aku ingin berkongsi>>>

kalaulah cik siput boleh berlari
kan dikeliling buana tika dinihari

kalaulah si gonggok lancang bersuara
dibelanya nasib mitra teraniaya

kalaulah termaktub unggas bertangan dua
nescaya tercabar sang semut pekerja kota

kalaulah pak belang tompoknya menjadi
masakan bahtera dirampas kemudi

kalaulah sang monyet tinggal di sisiran
ketam berjenaka, ikan bersiulan

apa semua ini?

kalaulah fantasi bertukar realiti
mungkinkah imaginasi akan lebih bererti?

andai duniawi dikocak naluri
adakah nafsu bertakhta dihati?

alangkah ria riak wajah
alangkah sayu melankolik menerjah

dimana fokus hijabmu?
dimana mata akalmu?

mengapa kau tak sependirian
masihkah terus aku dikemudiankan....................

Dear diary, u know i like to write things and u know how much i love to have someone as a listener..
but pity u r not responding.. u know whut, i started to write when i was still young i can say..
i dont need you becoz i have someone to share everything with. my teens time was remarkably fun and exciting...but what ive experienced in the past few days is hard to identified.i truly hope that it would be

R E W A R D I N G.


+ is that too much to ask??????!!!